Medicine the Alternative Way

Do you believe in alternative medicine? I do. But somehow alternative and modern medicine have been at logger heads for longer than we know. It is quite ironic since once upon a time "alternative" medicine used to be the past's modern medicine. How else would have societies before survived without things like anaestheia and operation theatres. Ok, so that was random, but you get my point right?

Even modern medicine is baffled at times at how tranditional remedies are able to treat and heal ailments, speed up labour and subdue pain. Alternative medications can include the consumption of herbs, massage, exercise and even using our body to combat potential medical complications.

Allah says in the Qur'an that there is a cure for every illness and since the Qur'an is a book for all times, Muslims believe that civilisations living centuries ago would have their own set of medical practices that remedied ailments and saved lives. Undoubtly modern medicine has played a fantastic role in prolonging life expectancy and curbing illnesses through vaccinations and check ups, but turning to natural medicine should never be an option ignored.

Cancer for example, I am sure it can be prevented or at least one can try to prevent it. The risk of breast, cervical and ovarian cancer can easily be reduced through breastfeeding. This, in its own right shows Allah's manifestations through His messages conveyed through our biological abilities.

Just a thought! I am all for alternative medicine, especially where modern science leaves gaps in their literature.

Beauty within Marriage

Among His signs is that He created for you spouses of your own kind in order that you may repose to them in tranquility and He instilled in your hearts love and affection for one another; verily, in these are signs for those who reflect (on the nature of the reality). (Ar-Rum: 21).

Marriage is such an important aspect of Islam that Muslims around the world look forward to marriage as a fulfilling journey in life. A lot of thought goes into search of a pious spouse - one who would always support you and make you happy & vice versa.

After a few months or years of holy matrimony though, it is not uncommon to fall into a bland routine of obligation. Especially with the emergence of tiny feet pittering and pattering around the house. Similarly, everything that was once exciting after the wedding has turned into drab and boring clothes, meals, outings and even quiet time together.

Giving your marriage an overhaul could be as simple as dressing up once in a while, a different hair-cut, some make up and a new perfume. Not only will your new look be appreciated by your spouse, it gives you a chance to buy something new for yourself and rejuvenate your own sense of beauty.

Marriage is beautiful but preserving the beauty within a marriage can sometimes be a chore so it is up to you to make it a pleasure. Making an effort to look good for your husband or wife holds many rewards and is a definite way of sprinkling some spice on marital bliss.

Spiritual Boost

Every once in a while we need a spirituality boost. Our imaan fluctuates. Some days we're jumping up and down ready for every prayer, supplication or dhikr. Other days are laced with lethargy and right-down laziness. Muslims are obligated to curb their imaan cycles from hitting bottom low to often. Do you? Do I? I guess that's for me to answer... but since we are all the same, our answers are probably the same, only the severity of the fluctuation differs.

Anyway, I found this site called Experiencing Psi -- Spiritual Consciousness.


It deals very much with the power of psychic or your sixth sense. I guess I would say I believe in those - since Allah Ta'ala speaks to us in His own ways - anything is possible. If you are interested in the powers of the subconscience and how you manipulate them to find inner peace and quiet, you should visit the site. There are some good articles there.

Like the post on telepathy. I was thinking about one of my closest friends/ whom I had lost touch with for over a year. I was at a shopping complex and nursing my son in a nursing booth with my head on the wall. Next door I could hear a baby chattering away with his mum. I thought to myself, "gosh, it would be nice if M was int he next booth - I have not seen her or her baby in over a year." I packed up once my baby was done with his afternoon snack and went off to look for the other members of my family.

Right in front of me was M with her baby. It was amazing, masha'Allah. She was not in the next booth, but she was around the corner. Could that have been telepathy?

I am sure some of you have had similar experiences - like when the phone rings, you have an inkling of who the caller is. I guess it is something like that.

I checked out the site and it does not weigh down on spirituality of any one religion. But as Muslims, (like other sites) use this one responsibly - remember it is Allah who determines our fate and our relationship with him surpasses any other beliefs - shirk is also a major sin, so remember to avoid that. Insha'Allah we will all be able to attain that place of ultimate peace and quiet in our lives!

A Muslimah's Reflections on Hijab

Every once in a while it is a good idea to remind one's self on the importance of Hijab. It can be only read through the Qur'an and Sunnah as to the beautiful directiv of Hijab upon believing men and women. Veiled Muslimah speaks soundly about the dress-code pertaining to Muslim women.

Masha'Allah, it is a beautiful read. Enjoy!

Keeping it Positive

Every year, for the past 3 years, I have made resolutions that I will be a more positive, optimistic person - generally, more likeable (even to myself) and motivated to look on the bright side at all times. But as the year wears on and events happen and rain pours down on me, I think... oh golly let's just go back to being my normal sarcastic, cynical self. By December I am always back to plodding along getting through the days, waiting for a fresh new start to motivate me into becoming this "better" person I am not.

I am all pro-positive thinking, but with so many problems happening in today's world, it is difficult to cope with adversities the way some people do. But since the world is make out of a vast number of speckles of different people, it is a good thing to read up on positive insights from around the blogsphere.

Like this, Diet Mind Spirit blog - I mean, basically, it is all coined into a nutshell that self improvement really comes from the mind. It is always mind over matter. If you are able to perceive everything as being positive or pincer-pick out the optimistic values of any problems, you would have a whole new outlook on life.

Idealistically the mind would be able to control the body. But if you are stuffing yourself with a bucket of fried chicken and thinking about how good it tastes without its consequences on your cholestrol then that would not work either. Somehow, the mind has to be generated to think of the long-term effects on the body. That is probably why I end up finishing a few barrels over the year.

It is bad not to be positive, it affects your body, mind and spirit all the time. It also erases gratitude and has a negative effect on your spiritual life, regardless of your faith. It also hinders the motivation to move forwards in achieving dreams.

Personal development is an integral part of survival in today's world. Complacency is a cancer of society and it has the ability to spread rapidly. So move forward, think realistically and always be positive!

I received one of those inspirational emails from a friend today and being the cynic I am, I was skeptical about many... but I loved this one:

Never laugh at anyone's dreams.

People who don't have dreams don't have much.

I am sure Cate from Diet Mind Spirit would agree. Dreams are the foundation of self-improvement.

It Does Not Mean You Do Not Care!

The Qur'an warns strictly of the care facilities that one has to provide for their parents, especially as they move on to the old sensitive age. This includes financial support, shelter, medical facilities, continuing education (especially religious education), a sense of belonging and plenty of love and care. Sounds like taking care of your new-born does it not? As my husband says, as we grow older, we tend to grow younger - not in a good way but physically, mentally and socially we are unable to do most of the things we were able to do when young. Sounds about right, does it not.

Most Muslim families have their parents live with them once they reach a certain age - it is an honourable thing to do, to take care of your parents - should anything happen to them, at least you are there and readily available to jump to their needs.

I once spoke of this to a non-Muslim friend who was having difficulties coping with her grouchy, diabetic and extremely stubborn grandfather who was spending his cranky days terrorising her working mother, instead of his own son. She was so flabberghasted that she wanted to shift him off to a home. Our Muslim friend disagreed, saying that it was their duty to take care of him, regardless of his attitude.

When they finally asked me what I thought, they were shocked to know I sided with my non-Muslim friend. My opinion was this, both his son and daughter-in-law worked long hours, and the 6 grandchildren who stayed with him either worked like their parents or were studying vigorously in school / university. He was left at home everyday, with a maid who did not speak the same language. He had a strict diet that he refused to follow and was generally grouchy and temperamental.

What he needed was this - a place to socialise with plenty of cheerful peers, avenues to exercise, medical care provided by personnel he could not bully and he needed to get out of the house. This was for his own good as well as the family's.

Personally, I think care homes are good for the elderly, all for the reasons above. At this age, they are free from any burdens of cooking and cleaning and working in general and they should be allowed to kick with buddies of their generation with a glass of milk and diabetic cookies, do some light exercise in the park and have professional people look after them. They should also be given their own time to reflect on life and read the Qur'an as often as they like. I'm not saying we should discard them completely - if it is possible for them to come home and sleep at home, then by all means, pick them up after work. The point is, they would not be alone at home during the day. It can be lonely for them, and sometimes depressing if everyone is rushing about, in and out of work, school, clubs, sporting activities, music classes. It happens - life goes on for the next generation and it is within their duties to make the best of their lives too.

Loving your parents does not mean you have to keep them bottled up in the living room the whole day - it is much like your children, you have to let them off to pre-school one day, just for the sake of getting up and about, out the house and learning something new in this unlimited world of wisdom. It is also a time for them to make friends and talk to other people. The elderly need that too, especially if a spouse has passed on - moping around at home can lead them down memory lane's more painful trips.

If you are concerned about sending your parents off to care homes as you should be, take time to do some research on the different types of care available. If you parents have conditions such as diabetes, high blood pressure, take time to look around for care-providers that will help them with their medication. Check if you can send your parents to homes for day-care only, much like pre-school, if you do not want them lodging there permanently. Also ask about the activities they arrange - like exercise and other social activities that will benefit your parents. If keeps the mind and body fit at all times. If you still have qualms about homes, you may want to consider bringing care into your home - that is also a viable option, though without the social aspect.

If you are living in the UK, bettercaring provides a whole list of caring homes for the elderly, that way you would be able to contact them directly and even pay them a visit, with your parents to check out their facilities and meet their people. It would be worth a search, in my mind.

Most homes provided that. Bettercaring will help you with all your questions if you are looking for options that will help your parents through their later years of their lives. They should happy years and they deserve that - it is part of caring for them.

I don't think my friend ever desposited her granddad into a home - as she put it. The facilities do not really exist in Asia, and besides the norm would be to keep your parents in your own home. I know many Muslim families here though feel there is a need to change. My mum-in-law mentioned that a few friends of hers put their heads together and rented a small house for all their parents to stay together. There they set up all the facilities for them to live comfortably and hired an Ustaz (religious teacher) to sit with them and read the Qur'an and tell them religious stories - just to remind themselves of the importance of being a Muslim. On the weekends, after five days of activities and pot-luck meals, they all return home to their families with a bundle of stories of their own to share with their kids and grandkids.

Relinquish Yourself From Debt NOW!

Muslim Matters blogged on something important a few days ago. DEBT! We all are acquainted with the pains and bruises that debt can cause us. Especially for Muslims, and I think, other faiths of the book, interest is gravely prohibited, whether we are a borrower, lender or privy in any way to an interest-based contract - it is a grave disobedience to one of our religion's directives to "not take interest" (Prophet Muhammad's (peace and blessings upon him) final sermon).

There are plenty of financial consultants, websites, help-articles, magazines, books and even tv programmes available to educate and help debt-ridden members of society to get back on the right track - back into the green. Advice usually revolves around the importance of using only cash when spending. Avoiding interest at all costs definitely helps save money and reduce stress and tension in the household.

However, there are times when one, Muslim or not, may need to apply for credit cards and / or personal financing. As a responsible Muslim, it is important to exhaust all options in searching for Shari'ah compliant instruments that avoid the concept of interest. The best way to do this is to become educated on the different forms of financing there are in the market. Learning and shopping around will deter rash decision-making that can lead to unwarranted stress and rising credit problems.

So whether you are a fresh graduate looking to build a future or someone with bad credit loans, Bad Credit Offers is a consultation web-site that is geared in easing the stress of debt. Firstly, they have shopped around for credit cards and financing options that will mitigate the risk in falling the red. Education is the other element of this credit service. By helping their customers understand their spending habits and eventually their credit standings (through their consultative services), you will be able to pro-actively curb the risk of over-spending in the future.

Over all, they are really looking into helping those who are struggling with credit problems with alternatives to consolidate their debt into one single source and provide steps in repaying the loans / interest at the soonest. Muslim Matters stated that 43% of Americans are spending more than they can earn - that is a serious responsibility issue.

However, this does not stop those who are already in the green from learning about how money works. We can never be to careful when spending our salaries, especially if a credit card is at hand. One too many swipes of that piece of plastic can push you over the edge when the bills arrive.

Managing money is really mind over matter - it is pure discipline and to arrive at that mind-set, it is best to educate yourself on the options there are in the market for financial help; your own salary and how to apportion it on necessities; and finally how to avoid over-spending, since this is the main cause of debt in the first place. But no matter how many web-sites you visit or how many books you buy, at the end of the day, it is up to you to take control over your cash outflow and to be responsible and honest with yourself and your family before matters get out of hand.

Sometimes it is easier said than done. But insha'Allah, if there is will, there is a way to get back into that green zone of comfort.

Muslimah Working From Home - The Smorty Option

Being a mother is a major headache for any Muslimah today. Ask any new mum nursing a baby or just carrying her bundle of joy around in her arms. You worry about those years to come whre baby is growing up and the years of hormonal turmoil that accompany children that follow.

That is why many Muslimahs turn to work from home. Even those fortunate enough to be fully provided for feel an inevitable need to earn money of their own. After all, we are all born to think, the same way our babies are born to grow and make their own decisions.

Muslimahs working from home is not uncommon in any country - in fact, women working from home are of multitude culture, religion, upbringing and social status. Many agree that once they graduate from being a wife to a mother, many feel compelled to search for opportunities to earn while tending to their children.

Luckily for many, these opportunities do exist. Writing, web design, small business accounting, blogging, provide avenue for women to reaslise their work from home dream.

Blogging for money is exceptionally popular for mothers with the penchant to write. Not only is blogging perceived as therapeutic, it allows mental activity, which can easily die off when tending to children 24 hours a day. Getting lost in your kids is not unusual, especially if you are sticking to a strict routine. Getting paid to blog is just the icing on the cake. The concept of getting paid to blog is known as blog advertising where bloggers are given blogging tasks by paying advertisers. An objective view of the product or service at hand, within a stipulated length allows the advertiser to have his or her product promoted through your blog.

Services like Smorty provides such energy for passionate bloggers to get paid for writing blogposts on advertisers. Of course not all Work From Home Muslimahs are bloggers and are the least interested in writing or blogging. But if your home-based business requires some advertising, turning to Smorty is also not a problem at all. Smorty accomodates advertisers of a range of businesses and passes on your business advertisements to bloggers for effective promotion. blog advertising is an affordable yet effective method of delivering your business credentials to a wide network of internet surfers.

In years to come many more women may leave the career paths for the full-time job as mum - and if things can't get more demanding, many will look into work from home opportunities. The headaches of being a mum and those hormonal years to come may effectively be subdued.

Who do you respect?

There are many interpretations of a woman wearing Hijab and plenty of misconceptions.

One important representation of a Hijabi woman is the fact that she wishes to be respected. Respect in today's world has very much to do with seniority and / or hierarchy. We tend to find that we need to respect people who are smarter than us, those who are older, more qualified or have more experience. We feel we need to respect men and women who demonstrate leadership skills, those who are higher-paid, those who have been around alot longer. They all command respect.

But why? Is it because we feel inferior to them - that they are better than us in certain skills, more knowledgeable than us in certain fields, drive a bigger car, live in a nicer duplex? Maybe they do reserve your respect. Maybe...

However, how do they command your respect - is it through haughtiness, dictatorship, arrogance, snootiness, the bling-bling of their sportscar's headlights as they wave goodbye to you while you are waiting in line for a bus?

It is easy to fall into the trap of respecting and looking up to someone because he or she is smarter, richer, more experienced, better looking or more qualified than we are. Having said that, of course, some of these smarter, richer, more experience, better looking, more qualified do deserve our respect - because there is another way of gaining respect from another person.

It is through modesty. A sincere conversation, being an active listener. Genuinely caring about another person. Displaying humility that any haughtiness of just by being smarter or richer than the next person does not affect you - rather it has an adverse effect on you - that you truly believe you would be the same person without all those qualities. You feel thankful and grateful for what you have and who you have become.

The same goes for a woman in hijab. Not only is her dress a representation of modesty. She values herself for the person she is without imposing herself on others. Muslims respect Sisters who respect themselves by adhering to the guideline of hijab.

Ingredients of a Muslimah

What makes up a Muslimah?

Modesty - A Muslim woman is always modest in her appearance and in every way she carries herself. She does not need to attract attention by sprucing up her her attire, neither does she need to jingle her bracelets. She does not need to laugh out loudly or dance around for others to notice her. Attention that is paid to her is through her intellect, her character, her wit and her

charm.

Uniqueness - She is proud of who she is and needs not to live up to expectations of others. She needs not beautify herself to please another; she needs not join social rings that invite the "in" club; she needs not indulge in gossip or slave over what is hot and what is not. She is herself, and she is proud to be herself - she does not mind standing out from the crowd in her own unique special way, in which she pleases Allah, and Allah alone.

Self-sacrifice - There is nothing more important than tending to others. They could be brothers and sisters in a war-torn country; orphans living down the street; her spouse and her babies; her parents and her neighbours. The self-sacrificing Muslimah always lends a hand. She may be cooking for her parents, organising a charity run, feeding her children, writing for a Muslim magazine. She sees her place in the world as a person who is there to make a difference.

Love - She is the all-time lover. She loves and hates for the sake of Allah - loving all that is clean and pure; beautiful and pious; she loves all that is good and anything that will help her be a better person. She loves her family and her spouse; her friends and her neighbours; her brothers and sisters of the Islamic faith and brothers and sisters of other faith. She loves her children, and mostly, she loves herself for she is a gift to herself from her Creator.

Imaan - Her imaan or her faith defines her. Because she submits to Allah, when she is happy, she praises Him, when she is in need, she prays for His help. Her unshakeable faith helps her through difficult times and reminds her of herself during happy times.

Meaningfullness - Idleness is her enemy. Laziness is her nemesis. The Muslimah's life is full of meaning. Everything she does, she has already understood that it is for a certain good. She moves forwards, never backwards. She leaps for opportunities and reaches out to the sky for stars and cloud fluff... all for a reason. She does not dwell in shallowness, neither does she indulge in ignorance. She always moves forwards, full of meaning.

Assurance - Or should I say self-assured? The true Muslimah is confident in the way she carries herself. Mostly because she does not have to feel belittled by those who prey on vulnerability. She does not need to answer to anyone but Allah and as long as he is not displeased with her, she has nothing to worry about! She looks beyond the superficial and all that is material... she looks to the afterlife and she is assured that everything she does works towards eternal happiness.

Humility - A Muslimah displays humility at all times. She is never arrogant or condescending upon others. She admits when she makes mistakes and corrects others with care and tact. She i a student regardless of her age and position and is always willing to learn something new. The vast knowledge Allah has displays, humbles her and no matter what her achievements are, she thanks Allah. In prayer, she demostrates humility when she places her forehead on the ground in full prostration to her Lord.

Who is really in control?

The Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) said that women totally dominate men of intellect and possessors of hearts.

But ignorant men dominate women, for they are shackled by an animal ferocity.

They have no kindness, gentleness or love, since animality dominates their nature.

Love and kindness are human attributes; anger and sensuality belong to the animals.

She is the radiance of God; she is not your beloved.

- Jalal Al-Din Rumi

Despite endless messages conveyed by Allah Ta'ala through His Apostle (peace and blessings upon him), blatant sexism exists in today's modern society, regardless of culture, traditions and religion. No matter how developed a nation's mentality can be, the continuous plight of differences and disagreements between Mars and Venue persevere and often cause more disruption than the mere commotion.

There are plenty of ayahs in the Qur'an calling for men and women to work together to form a progressive ummah. Treated equally but differently, men and women are made to complement one another.

The believers, males and females, are partners of one another; they shall jointly enjoin all that is good and counsel against all that is evil. (At-Tawbah 9: 71)

But women are not identical twins of men.

Possibly, this is where all the confusion begins. There is always talk of superiority and inferiority; passivemess and submission; leadership and even possible prostration. Most of the time, statements are made out of context and with an absence of understanding.

As Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him), this is obviously a concoction of the ignorant man!

In tow of modernity and female liberation in vogue, it is hardly news that Islam comes under fire when speaking of the status of women. Due to improper conduct of Muslim men and women, media hype capitalises in a few examples of animalistic capacity, as described by Jalal al-din Rumi.

It is unfortunate that men and women who fall into this category lack the understanding of Islam and its practices.

On the flip-side though, the non-Muslim world is not spared. Female liberation and progression that boasts freedom over and above the Hijab only provides avenues for women to be stuck in a rut of living up to expectations - and in general - the expectations of men.

It ranges from clambering up and down the corporate ladder, with a huge a compromise of values for many female employees; slaving to the latest skin deep trends and fashion faux-pas; being forced to contribute to the household income on a 50-50 basis and wake up for night feeds; or even having to forgo children all together.

Who possesses who? Who controls who?

Does nakedness of human society represent power or poverty. I guess it depends on which part of the world you dwell in - and if the answer is power, it is only skin deep. After all, sexism exists in the non-Muslim world too.